


Meeting Death Again

by purplevoices



Category: Half-Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Benrey is In Pain and Pining, Gen, Let me know if anything else needs tagging, takes place not long after the final fight, the rest of the science team is mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:15:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24578887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplevoices/pseuds/purplevoices
Summary: Benrey is stuck in the void again as he recovers from his most recent death, and he thinks about things.
Relationships: Benrey/Gordon Freeman
Comments: 12
Kudos: 187





	Meeting Death Again

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [It Came From the Vents](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24178177) by [KogoDogo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KogoDogo/pseuds/KogoDogo). 



It wasn't the first time he'd died.

It also wasn't the tenth. In actuality, he'd lost count.

Benrey stretched one arm out tentatively, wincing when the limb stretched out a bit more than it already was and then stayed like that. He knew he really shouldn't be moving, but just... _being_ in the void, unable to do much while his most recent form pulled itself back together, was mind-numbingly boring.

As complex as it was, he'd be fine after enough time had passed- he couldn't imagine being stuck where he was for longer than a month. While his regenerative properties were slow, they'd never failed him. Sure, it meant having to sit through this every once in a while, but he'd gotten used to almost every aspect of it ages ago.

With the exception of the boredom. 

He siiiiiiiiighed, and forced himself to sit up, three more eyes opening within the gooey black holding the guard's figure together. They shut almost completely a moment later as he let out a hiss- fuck, moving _hurt_. But there was nothing to look at in here except the little color from his outfit, and this time, Benrey was sick of it after only a couple of hours. He was getting out of here right now, he decided as he pushed himself harder to get up- he'd keep pulling himself together once he got somewhere that wasn't black as far as anyone could see.

Once he was sure he could stay on his now mangled feet without falling over, he opened his eyes- all of them focusing on that nothingness. Ten seconds passed before he gave up, throwing himself back down and ignoring the pain that shot through him- apparently he was too weak to just show up somewhere like he did sometimes.

Shit. This was going to be an agonizing wait.

Benrey's face scrunched up a bit, and he let the sweet voice escape him, smoky orbs hanging in the air close to his face. There were a lot of things he already missed about the four he'd gotten stuck with this time, but he was honestly happy that Tommy wasn't around to translate what he'd said with it- some things were meant to be private, like blue to burgundy. _How could you do that to me?_

How could he? But at the same time, it made sense. He'd perceived him as a threat and dealt with him accordingly. The rest had helped, of course, but it only hurt emotionally right at the end, because the final blow came from _him_.

Stupid fucking- emotions. He didn't- doesn't- know how to deal with them, and he'd learned a long time ago that humans didn't know how to give advice to nonhumans, so he tried to be as emotionless as he could at all times, only conveying them if they got to be too much through the sweet voice. Even that hadn't kept him for falling for Gordon, though, and hard.

And to think it started with a ladder he didn't know how to use properly.

The security guard took a few moments to empty his head so he could focus a bit better on his next thoughts. More sweet voice involuntarily left him- sepia to navy; dude, are you crazy?- and he almost laughed. He probably was. The reactions he'd get if he returned would vary immensely.

Tommy would be happy, probably. They could talk about beyblades or something. Bubby and Dr. Coomer would be neutral... ish? They were always a little hard for him to get a good read on. And Gordon- Benrey could easily imagine exactly what he'd be yelling.

Predictable.

He liked that about him. They had a lot of weird conversations, but Gordon was loud and he laughed or made broad gestures and got frustrated and was overall consistent.

Benrey thought about it a little more, one finger tap-tap-tapping away. Maybe it was a crazy thing to want to do, but despite knowing full well he might not be welcome back, he wanted to find them again. He already missed them and their weird antics.

But he couldn't do that in his current state. No, that was a great way to get himself shot at more times than he already had been. He'd wait it out, then.

Unwillingly, but he'd wait it out.

All his eyes blinked at the new sweet voice that left him- slate to goldenrod. And he smiled a bit when he properly translated it.

_It takes more than passports to kill a god._

**Author's Note:**

> gordon saying 'dying for the first time- or the tenth, I dunno' towards the end of the final fight got me thinking, and I wound up writing a little thing based off it.
> 
> figured I might as well make this public so here we are; hope you enjoyed
> 
> \---  
> I'm purplevoices on tumblr; catch me there if you wanna. I mostly reblog stuff, but I also post stuff I draw and just say weird shit sometimes. Anything said to me will never get ignored.  
> according to a lot of people I give off sorta scary vibes due to how I type, but I'm more of a chaotic bastard. if you get to know me You Will Understand


End file.
